Saturday night I found myself in a local gay bar with some friends. I went out to support some of my friends and a group they are a part of, also to have a good time with the 3 other straight friends I brought with me. It was a pretty standard night, excepting that they were doing line dancing and I am only mildly familiar with that form of dancing.
Regardless, I very much enjoy dancing, so I danced anyway. My friends I brought with me laughed as I tried to get them onto the floor. (They later would, once the music became more familiar and the dancing less in-line.) So as to not be in the way of all the people that knew what they were doing, I ran over to a slightly raised section of seats overlooking the dance floor and just starting letting the music move me. My friends came over to the area I was in shortly after that and we all talked and laughed while I danced.
Now, I had only had one drink and was nowhere near what anyone could even speculate as drunk when a man in a cowboy hat with a glorious mustache approached my friends and I. He started asking if we were charitable people and began talking about the organization he is raising money for. Naturally, we all expected him to ask us for money, but no, what he asked was far better. The man with the mustache saw that I really enjoy dancing and he asked me how much money it'd take to get me to dance in this cage box that they had at the bar.
I was shocked and excited! I told him I'd do it for free! It sounded awesome! My friends, of course were very encouraging and with that, the man with the mustache began going through the bar, taking donations to see me on stage. Now, most of these men at the bar knew I was straight, I knew a good lot of them anyhow, but I think something about being unobtainable makes me more attractive. I didn't request any money and everything he raised would go directly to the charity, I was just flattered and honored to even be asked.
After a short while the man came back to me and told that many people were wondering if they could give me tips. I thought sure why not! It is just more flattering and I didn't really expect to actually get any.
Shortly after that, still being completely sober, I took the cage box thing and I was introduced as "Bad Sam." Then I hear the familiar sound of Lady Gaga's Bad Romance and IT IS ON!
I danced my heart out. Stripped a little bit and just did my best to drive the bar crazy. I had people dancing and singing and it was awesome. I made 7 dollars in tips. . .2 of which I did not find until I got home and changed. Money can sure find its way into strange places. Most importantly though, I raised a bunch of money for a good cause and everyone had a great time.
I tell this story because I am very confused. You see, I had absolutely no problem dancing half naked in a room full of gay men. I didn't even hesitate, but today I found myself uncomfortable at a restaurant with friends. I can sing and dance and be goofy in front of droves of people, but I get anxious in an Applebees? How does that make any sense? I have a hard time going to the mall but I can spend hours roaming about crowded streets trying to convince people I am an impromptu street performer.
It just makes me wonder if maybe I am somehow wired backwards. Maybe I really am different and maybe that is the problem, maybe it always has been.
(Side note: In case anyone wanted to know, Sandi, from my last post, did contact her man and everything went great. Good for Sandi!)
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